"What boys need, first and foremost, is to be seen through a different lens than tradition prescribes. C. Boy underachievement in school. TONS of excellent things to remember when parenting boys. This book is one that I pick up every once and a while to skim; it is a good reminder in the throes of parenting, of what to bear in mind. Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 13, 2020, Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 15, 2016, Very helpful insights into male psychology, Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 19, 2014. If we approach every disciplinary situation with understanding, rather than shame, we won't miss that valuable learning opportunity and our boys will feel respected and thus empowered to steer themselves toward their better inclinations. “What do boys need that they’re not getting?” In a compelling success, Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson effectively tackle the toughest issues facing adolescent boys today: identity, self-expression, and “emotional intelligence.” In their book, the two psychologists candidly discuss the ways in which society has systematically suppressed the emotional needs of boys and compressed masculinity into stereotypical ideals, impossible for any boy to meet. The stunning success of Reviving Ophelia, Mary Pipher’s landmark book, showed a true and pressing need to address the emotional lives of girls. They reveal a nation of boys who are hurting- … But if he starts to hate himself because he isn't good at schoolwork, he'll fall into a hole that he'll be digging himself out of for the rest of his life.”, “I recognize you. My only complaint is that some of the illustrative stories were left open-ended (e.g., here is Joe, this was his problem and ...... nothing). Publication Date: April 4, 2000. Parents find them hard to talk to; friends can be a bad influence. I consider myself lucky to have a hand in raising a son to be a fine man, while also scared sh*tless about all the ways that it can go wrong. Chicago / Turabian - Author Date Citation (style guide) Kindlon, Daniel J. nevertheless “The most important thing to remember, the guiding principle, is to try to keep your son's self esteem intact while he is in school. Through moving case studies and cutting-edge research, Raising Cain paints a portrait of boys systematically steered away from their emotional lives by adults and the peer "culture of cruelty"--boys who receive little encouragement to develop qualities such as compassion, sensitivity, and warmth. That is the real risk to his success and to his mental health. II. . In Raising Cain, Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., and Michael Thompson, Ph.D., two of the country's leading child psychologists, share what they have learned in more than thirty-five years of combined experience working with boys and their families. ), for the most part they managed to stay pretty well planted in the constructionist mindset. Anyone who reads this book will recognise the behaviour of the boys and men in their lives to some extent, and for the female reader it gives a window into a world very different to our own. I feel far more prepared to guide my sons through their childhood after reading it. LibraryThing is a cataloging and social networking site for booklovers Excellent, highly useful and readable guide to the inner-workings of boys' minds, emotions, and how society's/peers/family's expectations of them (ironically, both too high and too low) affect their ability to manage tough emotions, relationships, life beyond young childhood. He lives outside Boston with his wife and two children. A leading researcher, Dr. Kindlon has a private psychotherapy practice specializing in boys and their families, and for the past ten years he has been the psychological consultant to an independent school for boys in Boston. Filled with relatable, thought-provoking real-life examples of boys' struggles in these areas, why they happen, how they can be avoided and how they can be helped. In Raising Cain, Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., and Michael Thompson, Ph.D., two of the country's leading child psychologists, share what they have learned in more than thirty-five years of combined experience working with boys and their families. As a counsellor, I found that this book gives useful insights into the pressures on young boys and the wounding that can be inflicted from a parental and cultural attitudes about masculinity. Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys - Kindle edition by Thompson Phd, Michael, Kindlon, Dan Phd. Have a little boy? essential resource for mothers, caregivers and teachers. Kindlon and Thompson set out to answer this basic, crucial q. This is exactly the kind of parenting book I learn the most from. To see what your friends thought of this book. Young male violence in the U.S. Nurturing and Protecting The Emotional Life of the Boy in Your Life as detailed in RAISING CAIN By: Dan Kindlon, Ph.D. and Michael Thompson, Ph.D. “The following seven points have the potential to transform the way you nurture and protect the emotional life of the boy in … I finally found a good one, after LOTS of lemons. Ever so slightly depressing, but a wake-up call, too, which is important. My husband (and, may father) are not typically (or, "stereotypically") masculine men in the way the book describes and both are very able to discuss, respond to, and convey emotions. In today’s society, boys are supposed to be tough. Some reviews expected more prescriptions. AbeBooks.com: Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys (9780345434852) by Kindlon, Dan; Thompson, Michael and a great selection of similar New, Used and … 1-Click ordering is not available for this item. The bo. That surprised me. Title: Raising Cain: Protecting The Emotional Life Of Boys Format: Paperback Product dimensions: 320 pages, 8.2 X 5.5 X 0.6 in Shipping dimensions: 320 pages, 8.2 X 5.5 X 0.6 in Published: 4 avril 2000 Publisher: Random House Publishing Group Language: English To get the free app, enter your mobile phone number. Okay, so I am obsessed with parenting books. Click to read more about Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys by Dan Kindlon. Brain differences between boys and girls. I didn't really need to read long sections on how it's not appropriate to hit your son and how it's important to remember that boys have feelings too. This was an interesting book. ), but most of the book felt more like a reminder of things one should keep in mind with ANY child - not just with boys. Teasing and lashing out from peers teaches one boy he can gain power from being hurtful, and teaches another not to be emotional in public. You could not only going in imitation of books gathering or library or borrowing from your associates to admittance them. Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., a member of the Harvard University faculty for over fifteen years, teaches child psychology and conducts research in child development. About Raising Cain. I think this book as many compelling and helpful insights that parents and educators can use, even if it doesn't give a concrete road map or dialog prompts for all of them. My husband (and, may father) are not typically (or, "stereotypically") masculine men in the way the book describes and both are very able to discuss, respond to, and convey emotions. It gave me a couple of things to think about, but mostly, the perspective of the authors is skewered by being counsellors to troubled boys. We’d love your help. R.E.A.D Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys (Ballantine Reader s Circle) They illuminate the forces that threaten our boys, teaching them to believe that "cool" equals macho strength and stoicism. This affectionate, encouraging book should be require reading for anyone raising--or educating--a boy.". As a high school teacher, then an academic in education and now as a mother of boys, there was nothing in the book particularly "new" to me. In Raising Cain, Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., and Michael Thompson, Ph.D., two of the country's leading child psychologists, share what they have learned in more than thirty-five years of combined experience working with boys and … So very real about what is happening with our boys and their emotional self and mental health in a society that believes boys should be raised to be "tough" not "emotional".. Children in your life? By using specific case studies from their comb. I found this book in my church library, and as I was reading it, I wished everyone who worked with children would read it. Speaking as someone with a background in gender studies/anthro, nothing in this book was terribly new, and although some of the generalizations were annoying and simply not true (boys are more easily aroused than girls, eh? The book describes a lot of things. This is one non-fiction book that I have read cover to cover, and that is really rare for me. Raising Cain has been an eye-opening read, albeit certainly not a comforting one. “Raising Cain: Protecting the emotional life of boys” by Dan Kindlon and Michael Thompson. I understand so many men and boys in my life differently now. Introduction: Three Important Issues in the Lives of American Boys. So, maybe it's because this is the first one I've read, but I adored this book. Instead, it's a broad but also deep overview of (a portion of) the landscape of child development. They learn to never show their feelings, and they can be aggressive. It shows unequivocally how our educational system (and to a certain extent, our culture) is structured in a way that will stunt the emotional development of boys. Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood, Boys Adrift: The Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men, Strong Mothers, Strong Sons: Lessons Mothers Need to Raise Extraordinary Men, The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind, Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, "Brilliant . And I will certainly try to incorporate the books lessons into my parenting of my young sons. Disappointing. By using specific case studies from their combined 35 years experience in the field of child psychology, the authors succeed in describing the emotional pitfalls of boyhood from birth through the college years. Fulfilment by Amazon (FBA) is a service we offer sellers that lets them store their products in Amazon's fulfilment centres, and we directly pack, ship, and provide customer service for these products. This book is a must-read for fathers, educators, and mothers. Your recently viewed items and featured recommendations, Select the department you want to search in. I haven't seen any other book focus so much on the "inner lives of boys", and reading this has made me re-examine many of my own beliefs and feelings about boys and "boy behavior". The stunning success of Reviving Ophelia, Mary Pipher’s landmark book, showed a true and pressing need to address the emotional lives of girls. No Kindle device required. A leading clinical and research psychologist specializing in behavioral problems in children and adolescents, Dr. Kindlon has focused on the diagnosis and treatment of emotional issues, learning disabilities and attention deficit disorders in o. Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., a member of the Harvard University faculty for over fifteen years, teaches child psychology and conducts research in child development. B. A must have for all moms of boys and even girls alike. Welcome back. Boys are encouraged to compete ruthlessly, to remain unaware of their inner lives, and to avoid any expression or behavior that smacks of the feminine. Cutting through outdated theories of "mother blame," "boy biology," and "testosterone," the authors shed light on the destructive emotional training our boys receive--the emotional miseducation of boys. I am not sure it gives much insight into how boys from other cultures or countries deal with many of the issues the authors raise. 2000. One of the CPD strands at school this year has been to develop a greater understanding of gender. They seemed to conclude that the problems these boys were having represented all boys and that the functional kids just weren't confessing. Highly recommend. I was often brought to tears by some of the stories and explanations I read, and having lived through some of this with my younger brother who was labeled as a troublesome boy when he was very young, and suffered through grade school, high school, and college (which he never did finish and included a diagnosis of bipolar disorder that may or may not be accurate), I see the truth in much of what they discuss, and I have a new and better awareness of how I might be better as a parent to a young boy and how to better be his advocate as he gets older and moves through the school system. I already told my mom to check it out. After viewing product detail pages, look here to find an easy way to navigate back to pages that interest you. 1st trade pbk. Be the first to ask a question about Raising Cain. In Raising Cain, Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., and Michael Thompson, Ph.D., two of the country's leading child psychologists, share what they have learned in more than thirty-five years of combined experience working with boys and their families. This is certainly not a how-to manual (which the authors clearly state in the preface that they don't intend to be), and much more of a why-we-have-to. Fast, FREE delivery, video streaming, music, and much more. They illuminate the forces that threaten our boys, teaching them to believe that "cool" equals macho strength and stoicism. Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys It's not a set of prescriptions for how to treat your kids. Anyway, I end up reading a lot of books about parenting in general, and a lot of books about parenting girls, but I've never read one about boys. He'll find a niche where the fact that he can't spell well or didn't read until he was eight, won't matter. Learnt a lot. But instead of constructive preventative suggestions, as the title indicates, what I found was a series of case studies of unhappy boys, an analysis of their problems, and a description of how their problems were fixed by therapy with the authors. Review Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys. I think it's important that this book exists, but I'm not necessarily the intended audience. You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition. As a woman raising a son in a 2-mom household, I have found myself very focused on what it means to be a boy in our culture. The authors made many important points about the male experience that were new to me, or vague, and also gave practical ideas and examples for achieving goals or avoiding conceptual traps. But overall, I didn't learn as much as I was hoping to learn. I liked the subject of it. This was one of the most thought-provoking books I’ve read in 2020. I was often brought to tears by some of the stories and explanations I read, and having lived through some of this. As a woman raising a son in a 2-mom household, I have found myself very focused on what it means to be a boy in our culture. I thought the chapter on father/son relationships was really powerful. Something we hope you'll especially enjoy: FBA products qualify for FREE Shipping. Barker. That's not particularly helpful or relevant to a parent as opposed to a professional therapist. Buy Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys New edition by Kindlon, Dan, Thompson, Michael (ISBN: 9780140279702) from Amazon's Book Store. Everyday low … Like “Because if there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that, unless we give him a viable alternative, today’s angry young man is destined to become tomorrow’s lonely and embittered middle-aged man.” I think this is a must read for parents of boys and for teachers as well. So insightful! I think this book as many compelling and helpful insights that parents and educators can use, even if it doesn't give a concrete road map or dialog prompts for all of them. All these aspects are part of a growing generation of boys who cannot show the world what they want or how they feel. raising-cain-protecting-the-emotional-life-of-boys-dan-kindlon 1/14 Downloaded from www.wordpress.kubotastore.pl on December 2, 2020 by guest [MOBI] Raising Cain Protecting The Emotional Life Of Boys Dan Kindlon Eventually, you will categorically discover a other experience and exploit by spending more cash. A chink of light at the end of a very dark tunnel for some. They learn to never show their feelings, and they can be aggressive. Recently my school disctrict decided to have an open discussion based on this book, so I decided to read it. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. I will keep this book close by as my sons grow and refer back to the chapters on later childhood/teenage issues for guidance for sure. Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys - Ebook written by Dan Kindlon, Ph.D., Michael Thompson, PhD. © 2008-2020, Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. The good news is that this doesn't have to happen. But I know too many college-age men who've grown up emotionally illiterate - almost started welling up at one point, actually, because it reminded me so much of him - and it doesn't have to be that way. I think it was good, but not really for me personally. Which is not bad to be reminded of as a new parent. In today’s society, boys are supposed to be tough. Start by marking “Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys” as Want to Read: Error rating book. A leading clinical and research psychologist specializing in behavioral problems in children and adolescents, Dr. Kindlon has focused on the diagnosis and treatment of emotional issues, learning disabilities and attention deficit disorders in over 20 years of clinical practice. A fantastic book written with such compassion. All these aspects are part of a growing generation of boys who cannot show the world what they want or how they feel. And perhaps just as interesting and useful, a very good bas. Having two boys and realizing that I myself stopped understanding boys at the age of eight (or in my lingo, "I stopped being a boy around 8"), I find the reminders of the general trends in adolescence helpful, in particular. Teachers punish them differently than the girls.
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